To Love
by To Fly Or To Dream
Summary: "It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never have loved at all." It was something new to him, but he lost it, denied the chance before taking a leap and following his godfather through the Veil. But Truth does not owe him answers as to his destination, only telling Harry that it would change his life, and those he would share that with, forever. Gen-bending, lang, fluff
1. The Beginning

_Love. An unspoken act of emotion. One he was unfamiliar with. Of course, there were times when what felt like a flicker of warmth washed over him for the briefest second. A glance from her would cause such a feeling, but it was always cut short by her turning her head away, either to look at the book in her lap or to turn to another friend. That feeling abruptly faded, leaving him cold and empty._

_No, it was not always. He could vaguely remember the one time she didn't turn away, didn't refuse to meet his green, ever-so-bright green eyes. She just stood there, watching. Always watching as he stepped forward hesitatingly, first one step, then another. Silence echoed as he slowly walked toward her, always thinking that, as always, it would end. She would turn her face away, to run, to hide. _

_But tonight, it seemed that was not to be._

_She felt frozen, her breath a whisper in the chilled air. Those bright eyes, hypnotizing green eyes that always caught her attention, glowed in the faint candlelight with some indescribable, something pure. They slowly drew closer, watching her face for the slightest movement, as if he was afraid that she would look away from that face, hiding the heat on her cheeks._

_Hiding her unsanctioned attraction._

_She knew, oh did she know the risks. The consequences. If anyone were to see them alone even now, her life would be forfeit. But as he drew closer she found herself unable, unwilling to move. To push their savior away to keep him safe from the danger he would bring. _

_He saw that flicker of fear in her eyes and paused, standing in front of her with his hand outstretched, hovering in the air beside her face. Her eyes were closed, her head turned away from his hand, to her left. She was scared. Of him.  
And so his hand fell, hanging limply by his side as he stared at her face, memorizing that face that made that feeling appear again. But now, it was just a hollow echo of its former self. He wanted to feel it more, to understand it. Her eyes slowly opened and she turned her head to look at him, an apology on her face and lips. But it was never spoken, never expressed. She broke, the barrier on her heart cracked and she sat heavily in a chair, her hands on her face and crying. She had been so afraid of what would happened; how could she have been so blind? His eyes, his heart, his whole soul and being was crying out 'I love you', yet she had been afraid and turned away from him all those years. She tipped back her head and cried to the skies, the echo of a torn soul hopelessly lost. And now...now..._

_Their savior had left. And he wasn't ever coming back._

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___"It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never have loved at all." _Prologue of my first actual story that I'm posting, titled 'To Love'. It's a Harry Potter x Naruto fanfic, for future warning there is **gender-bending** included, **fluff**, and some **people getting smothered** by someone who could give even _Snape_ the **warm and fuzzies**. Story style will fluxuate between the above style and standard 'fanfic-style', as I've chosen to dub it. Mostly this style I think.

So, like it or hate it? Eitehr way, I'd like to hear your opinion :) I've written fanfics before, I just never have bothered to create an account and post them. So at the prompting of my friend and self-proclaimed editor, I'm giving it a shot.


	2. The Decision

**Wow, this got more followers than expected! Anon, thanks for pointing out that error!**

**C'mon everyone else, how am I meant to know if it's any good unless you tell me? Review and let me know! Anyways, now to start a bit more of this story.**

**I should put a disclaimer here: Obviously, with this being a fanfiction site and all, I don't own Harry Potter or Naruto. This is the only time I'll put it here.**

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He shifted from foot to foot as he crouched before that place of memories, his battle-weary eyes hidden behind closed lids. While his Occlumens shield was strong enough to withstand even the most brutal of attacks, his was helpless against the memories that flooded his mind. Memories of a long and lonely past, his years at Hogwarts, Dumbledore's death, and Voldermort's rise. His face remained neutral, though he wanted nothing more than to kick, scream and cry to the heavens at the injustice of it all.

He had given the wizarding world all they had asked for and so much more, but gained nothing in return. And after his usefulness was over he was discarded, left alone once again as he tried to fit into the side of the world that he knew and loved. On the muggle side, no one knew who he was or what he'd done. It was the first time he didn't feel the pressure of a whole world on his shoulders. He made friends, he even got a job. But he never could bridge the gap between himself and his new friends, it just wasn't something he knew how to accomplish.

He tried. Oh, how he tried. But the world couldn't see past the image of the 'Boy-Who-Lived' that they had created, to see the shy, frightened, and alone teen that wanted nothing more than to live a normal life. He was always raised to be sacrificed, raised to protect the wizarding world who were responsible for his past. Raised to protect a world that shunned him after the deed was done, a world that hadn't expected him to live.

A world that wanted-no, _needed_ him to die so they could return to their normal lives. And now he had found his way.

The Veil of Death in the Department of Mysteries.

No one knew what it truly did, they all thought it was a portal of instantaneous death, a one-way ticket to Death's realm. Most were correct, but they were also wrong. Harry left the muggle world when the sole few surviving Death Eaters killed the people he was staying and working with, choosing to come back to the world that had abandoned him so long ago. Not wanted anywhere, he was able to secure a job as far away from the public as possible: researching the Veil and other phenomenon in the Department of Mysteries. And he enjoyed it, the peace, the solitude. Not to mention he practically lived there, Dobby's numerous children always popping in to feed him and remind him to sleep when he forgot. Harry silently thanked them often, they weren't as self-harming as other house-elves after being around him so much, but they would still threaten to burst into tears every time he thanked them vocally.

But after many long years he had finished. The curtain of torn fabric, not unlike the long-destroyed Dementor's cloaks, fluttered gently in a faint wind, something that could only be felt when one's face was almost touching the fabric. Pale hands slowly reached out to brush against the fabric, Harry suppressing a shudder at the chill of the Veil, the sense of foreboding that slithered up his spine. That feeling of loneliness and despair touched him again as he slowly stood, wincing as his knees creaked and protested and feeling slowly returned to them. As he stepped forward he reflected, _I would never have had the courage to do what was truly right back then_.

And Harry Potter, Boy-Who-Lived, sacrifice of the Wizarding World and a broken man, stepped through the Veil to end it all.

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_"It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never have loved at all." _The updates will fluxuate between once a couple of weeks, to anywhere up to a couple of months. University is a pain in the butt like that...Especially in exam season! Hence why this chapter is late, plus I kinda got addicted to Doctor Who... Also sorry that it's so short, I couldn't find a good way to end it but ending it here worked out good for my next chapter, so I'll leave it here.

So, like it or hate it? Either way, I'd like to hear your opinion :)


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